San Stefanos Online ~ North West Corfu
Welcome to San Stefanos (NW Corfu) => San Stefanos news and views => Topic started by: BorisBiggins on April 16, 2018, 10:47:20 AM
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Hello everybody
Boris Biggin here. I have now got a new passport after my incident the few years ago . I will now be looking forward to the work at Tasty Corner in summertime.
I am hopeful of renewing the acquaintance with my good friend like Tony Cok, Himbo, jool Trucker and the silly man who always makes the pepole wear silly hat for the TubeYou Web station.
Has been tough winter here in Albania. My wife lost a finger so been difficult for her to harvest the potato .
Anyway I will sail to San Stefanos in my dinghy at start of May. I stay in the cellar under Fantasea hotel this summer. Please say a big hello if see me and maybe buy me beer?
Goodbyre and happy easter
Boris
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Dear Boris - wonderful to hear from you. Sorry about Mrs Boris' accident with her finger. Is she still able to play the mouth-organ? I will never forget her four hour improvisation on Albanian goat-herder songs at the Condor, and, as a learner on the bouzouki I must say your accompaniment was memorable.
We have also stayed in the Fantasea cellars, which is a privilege, as they are usually reserved for Thomson reps!
Safe voyage, and I hope you'll have some of those Albanian dung-flavoured cigarettes with you when we meet up!
Jim
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Haha ;D
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Hello Mr Himbo
So glad you are still enjoying the San Stefanos for your holiways.
I will not be smoking this summer...... veryyyyy nawty is the smoking and I give up after nearly setting fire to the petrol place in Tirana.
Do not tell Mrs Boris but I hope to be in cellar with preetty Thomson lady hee hee.
I still have t shirt you gave to me about the place called Hull? I never been there but man told me it is full of not nice peeps who smell of cod? A bit like Bentises no? Haaaaaaaa ha
When you come to Korfu? I hear Tony Cok is coming over in May and he has lost his belly? Too much tickle & slap with Mrs Cok no?
I hope to see regular peeps and friends across summer. I hope the bee keeper man does not hire quaddy bicycle. He too told now, he think he is Steve The Queen in Escape to Victory film?
Anyway must go as I am coooking the turnip soup. Is delicacy is Alabania.
Bye the bye
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Dear Boris - Of course I won't say a word to Mrs Boris about your capers with the Thomson reps. However, I fear you'll not get much out of them unless you sign up for some very expensive trips and also go to their 5:45 am Welcome Meeting! You are right about the quad bikes. San Stefanos is now a high-risk place with too many sunburned OAPs whizzing about like maniacs as though there was anything urgent to do.
I'm sure O Spiros at Nafsika would be interested in your turnip soup. He is always looking for new and exotic things for the menu. Last year's Patagonian Sloth On The Spit was very interesting, and I gather he's adding a new Australian drink to the cocktails menu called "The Crying Cricketer."
Just to let you know, this is the last year that Thomson (TUI) will be including the Fantasea cellars in their brochure. Jet2 are taking it over next year: they're adding to their "Friendly Low Fares" range with a new brand called "Cheap As Chips." The good news is that all the Jet2 reps come from Yorkshire, and they're all big girls with hairy knees! Joy! Mind you, that's one of the great things about Agios Stefanos: if you take a walk along the beach you'll find loads of big girls with hairy knees!
P.S. Cod is very difficult to find in Hull. But you'd feel at home - it's a bit weird and nobody comes here.
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LOL, enjoying this banter,something a little bitty different. Oh, and welcome to the forum Boris ;D.
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Jim, you've been peeping at my knees!! :-[
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Gud evening Mr Wonkie, thanking you for kind welcom to this group. I think we met on rainy afternoon in bar with ginger barman who speak with silly voice and torture peeps by singing terrible love song at top of voice.
You show Mrs Boris your bouzouki I think and she impressed.
Mr Wonkie do you know my friend Scott Lofty?
Himbo I meet this Spiro man in 2008.....he keep telling me story of Greek God who wash up on beach. I think he talking about Tony Cok again
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Jim, you've been peeping at my knees!!
Blush!
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Hello holiday friends
Greetings from rain infested Albania.
Has been long wet winter here. Very damp and smelly just like Jumbo's Speedos. Ha ha.
Once again Boris has been offered job for summer in San Stevonas. I cannot yet reveal where work will be but will be very good for Boris .
Hope friends are okay. Hearing big Cok Tony has operations but is on the mend? Maybe I see him on nudie beach flying his kite again?
And Done from Sticky On Trent has new lady and he get married? Congratulations from all here in Tirana.
Not long now to open shutters and shout a big Boris hello to everyone even those from dodgy places like Warrington
Kaly Nachta
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Dear Boris - how lovely to hear from you after all this time! I really like the use of "jumbo" in relation to the contents of my Speedos. I've sent them to the cleaners already for their pre-departure stretching. How are the saintly Mrs Boris and cute little Boris Jnr?
Maybe we should really be in the Yammas Bar to exchange UK-Albanian pleasantries?
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I have absolutely no idea what this is about but its made me laugh out loud at work which is frowned on-civil servants are not supposed to enjoy their day... ;D
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Brilliant Boris 😂😂 I had my doubts but that last line confirmed it. See you in August, if you haven’t been banned from the village by then!
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Hello Bumbo
I have idea no where this Yabbas bar is?
Maybe in old town yes? Let Boris know and he will be there. No little Boris yet (at least that I know with Mrs Boris)
Hearing big news that old dog Manthos has moved to Sidaro and taverna will be new MacDonald ?
Who is the DG man? Does he know ScotLofty and Gavlah? Maybe he like chomping on too much Geeros?
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Word has roached me in Albania. Natasha warmed me.
She say "there is an impressionator on the forum.... Boris Bigun"
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Of course there is. ti je budalla
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Well day has come where Boris say big Yassoo to Mrs Boris and I leave Albania for big trip to San Stephanie
I have been told there is job for me but is only picking up litter and managing car park on beach. Not pay so well so if you see me please buy me a Gee Ros!
Not sure where I work yet as naughty man at Naffy sicka not got room in basement for me now as he is keeping goat down there for squeak cheese.
Look forward to seeing all friends from UK soon. But not bad man Bimbo who ignore me and read electronic books all time
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I don't think Bimbo's ignoring you, Boris. He's avoiding you.
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Maybe I should point out to newer members of the forum that Bimbo and "Boris" are actually good friends. "Boris" has a long and fascinating past - and was a very brave man. "Boris Biggins" is, of course, a pseudonym. None of us will ever know his true identity because, for reasons of security, he has many disguises. During the dark days of Hoxha's rule in Albania he was a much-feared member of the "Sigurimi" - the secret police. That, at least, was what people thought. In reality, he was a double agent for MI6, risking his life on many occasions.
His affection for Corfu goes back a long way. He helped to thwart an Albainian plot to annex Corfu from a power-base established in Kavos, on the southern tip of the island. There, highly-trained Albanian troops were posing as tourists - sunburned drunkards wearing Leeds United football shirts, downing shots like there was no tomorrow. For them, there wasn't. "Boris" stole a pedalo just south of Sarande on the Albanian coast and pedalled across to Corfu Town, where he alerted the authorities. The insurgents were isolated in Kavos. With no way out, they were trapped.
At that time his MI6 handler was, in fact, Bimbo - another man whose real name few people know. Bimbo put pressure on Thomas Cook, and they began to ship huge numbers of real Leeds United supporters to Kavos, who then beat the crap out of the Albanians. Unable to to go home to face shame, the Albanian troops stayed, pretended they were Corfiots, opened shoddy night-clubs selling watered-down vodka at inflated prices, and seduced any girls stupid enough to wear a Manchester United shirt. A secret hard border, a cordon sanitaire, was established around Kavos. To this day, armoured buses drive from the airport, taking more enforcers - or "tourists," as they are known - to Kavos, where they remain for a few weeks terrifying the remnants of Hoxha's hapless invasion force. That is why, if you are foolish enough to mutter anything critical of Corfu in Agios Stefanos, the locals will frown and say "This is not Kavos."
I believe this is the first time some of the true story of "Boris" has been told. He will feature highly in the book that Anne Wenz Dorou and I are writing, provisionally called "Secret Heroes of the Athens Bar." After the fall of the Communist regime "Boris" kept up his surveillance role, and even started a brewery in Tirana, personally selecting the ingredients for Albania's finest beer, known as "Peess." Only a handful of people in the village know what lies behind the carefully-constructed facade of being a buffoon which "Boris" presents. There are still security risks. Many who were exposed by his intelligence leaks wish to see the the end of him. Bimbo is not one. When he tells "Boris" to go away in Albanian he is merely issuing a warning that "Boris" should be careful.
Some code words are still dangerous. Never, ever, however much you love Albanian beer, have a pint in the Athens Bar and say to Nikos "This beer tastes like Peess."
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Crikey...... Never realised there was such a dark and serious side to all this.
Don't think I've ever met Boris but will try and seek him out
Does he ever frequent Condor?
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Does he ever frequent Condor?
Who knows? He is a master of disguise. One day he can pose as Tony Cox - another as Don Whyte. Sometimes, perhaps, Glen from the Aquarius bar.
I have discovered one infallible test. If you speak to any of the above and what they say makes sense, be very suspicious.
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Don’t say too much Jimbo or someone might try to silence you-can’t be too careful even on holiday.
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You're absolutely right, Maggie. I learned years ago that saying you'd rather stay in the EU is a dangerous thing to do!